Quiet After The Storm

The dust settled. Over 102 miles, 5 hours, lunch, 2 houses, 2 schools, 1 track and field, and a frozen yogurt later: I feel sure I am supposed to be alive. Just 4 months ago I was writing suicide letters to loved ones. “Dear [therapist name],” I started, but never could finish that one. Tears…

A 5-year-old & Her Therapist

I gain healing when I am able to recognize and embrace the inner child parts of me that feel hurt or sad or angry and receive love in return to letting those emotions and child-state be known. I feel warm, open, willing, enthusiastic, and so hopeful I will keep healing. I kept eating and reached…

Describing Emotional Pain

(It must be) Like accidentally slicing your skin to bone with a brand new chopping knife and feeling alternating relief and extreme pain as you watch your blood pour out. Like fainting, hitting your head on the corner of a glass table on your way down, and everyone around saying, “she’s fine. Just leave her.”…

Emotional Medley

You can be two things at once. You can be many things at once. You can be on-the-edge-of-jumping depressed but find joy and comfort in your children’s laughter and endlessly sweet hugs. You can be motivated to recover and afraid--even unwilling--to let go of your eating disorder. You can go back and forth between the…