I am still sad.

I feel quite off-kilter. Though, I quite believe I shouldn’t feel this way.

I cannot be both optimistic and sorrowful. I cannot be joyful and sad. Motivated and anxious. (But haven’t you learned you can be all of these at once?)

I cannot be so many things at once that are so separate from each other. The pull confuses me and I feel uncertain.

I don’t trust these feelings. I don’t trust myself. I don’t trust.

2 thoughts on “Dear diary p. 2

  1. It can be so unsettling to feel contradictory emotions at the same time! Which one is “real”? I have experienced this many times. Over time I have come to accept that it IS possible to have hope and fear, joy and sorrow, at the same time. Every change, even if we like it, means the loss of something familiar. We also have different parts with different motivations (child part wants comfort, adult part wants to appear dignified, etc). So I know it’s confusing and uncomfortable, but I also believe it’s very normal and human. I hope you won’t judge yourself for these normal contradictions. 💕

    Liked by 1 person

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