On the one hand, relief exists in greater proportions when the sun goes down than I have known in a long time. I don’t need anyone.

On the other hand, disappointment rings, vibrating through every cell in my body, dancing so perfectly with shame and guilt.

Somewhere in between relief and shame the rest of me is silenced. I guess that’s the point. All that’s left is depression and anxiety and a very loud dictator.

3 days—it’s fine. That’s nothing. You can keep going for a bit longer. Nothing is going to happen.

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