No. More. Contact.

You have to get through this shit yourself. You are never going to get through this. Stop wasting everyone’s time.

I was trying so hard to continue to let my body release whatever it needed to, without judgement and with help. But it became too intense over the last 48 hours and I cannot handle it.

My jaw hurts so bad it’s painful to eat. My digestive system is totally frazzled. Fear comes and goes and with that comes shaking, crying, cold/hot flashes, panic attacks, constant anxiety, insomnia.

I feel like I’m on a deserted island left to impossibly deal with myself, and I’ve already used up all my lifelines and skills.

I woke up at 5, after barely sleeping, in a hotel room and asked to leave as soon as my husband woke at 7am. Disappointment flooded my body—it was supposed to be fun and relaxing but I just wanted to go home. I’m missing a family gathering right now because my whole skull hurts and because I’m failing at managing fear.

No where is safe. I am not ok.

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