I just saw a picture of myself. I look like I have gained 20 pounds.

I know what I weigh. I have not gained 20 pounds. or 10. or 5. The point is that I looked hideous. I looked disgustingly fat. I am not eating tomorrow. I have these half-sentences of logic swirling around in my head but they’re not complete. All that is complete is this: I am fat. I need to lose weight. I need to lose weight. right. Now.