why does this hurt so bad…

I just keep wanting to cry.
I feel like I am being annoying.

He doesn’t really want to talk to me. I can feel it..his answers are short and the conversation keeps going only because I am desperately trying to keep it going. I miss him so badly all I want to do with all my free time is talk to him….and I can’t understand why, when he says he’s not doing anything, he won’t actively talk to me.
I know he’s going through such a hard time right now, and especially the next month. But I feel so left out.