I was fine until they started talking about how much fat was in the calzones we had just consumed. I knew they were not the most healthy food in the world, but the second they started talking about it, panic set in.

The familiarity of the actions made it easy. The shower, the drain, the fierce feeling of failure coupled with the euphoria and relief that some of the dinner contents will not be broken down by gastric lipase and stored as fat somewhere in my body.

It had been since April. Five months. …

I don’t feel good at things lately. Missing varsity by 7 seconds. Studying wrong things for tests. purging after not having purged for 5 months.