and being so many different sizes in a day is very confusing.

I wish I could sleep at night. My mind won’t stop spinning.

I got up, went to school, got my lab practical back (97%), went straight to work until 4:30pm. My day was rather normal. I wasn’t thinking negatively, necessarily. I was thinking about all sorts of things–impartial to being positive or negative, good or bad, and it is all very foggy. It’s all milling around and if I try to ignore it all I feel empty. I feel nothing. If I try to sort through it, I get this sinking feeling. I am equally divided between exact order and complete chaos.

She generally gave herself very good advice, (though she very seldom followed it), and sometimes she scolded herself so severely as to bring tears into her eyes; and once she remembered trying to box her own ears for having cheated herself in a game of croquet she was playing against herself, for this curious child was very fond of pretending to be two people. `But it’s no use now,’ thought poor Alice, `to pretend to be two people! Why, there’s hardly enough of me left to make ONE respectable person!’

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